as you can tell…

…it’s been a challenge to keep up lately. Many activities in progress — the graduation(s), parties, wedding weekend whirl to Chico and back, Mia’s visit, and so on. Still trying to get Moni’s graduation photos and announcements in the same place at the same time.

Kids are out of school for summer, and the garden is just cranking up. I’m drying a bunch of green plums right now in the dehydrator and planning to make some jam tomorrow. Work is busy, home is busy, and it’s really a challenge these days to keep up, because much of my energy has been diverted to self-care. A day or two this week I fell off the wagon and didn’t eat when I should have and it is kicking my patoot. Like Big Time.

Which is why I’m sitting at home instead of rooting for the home team at Washington Park right now. Cold and tired and going to bed very soon. I ate a good meal with Ana and now she’s watching a movie. We watched an episode of The Office together and it was so funny. I came in here to check email and watched Yahoo do stupid things, then did a bit of maintenance on the blogs. I’m taking a break from A Year with the Saints because, in my battle with What’s Wrong With Me, Oh, It’s Diabetes, I blew out too many days and mucked up the concept of a diary for a year. Blew that one to hell, so to speak. So it’s down for the count and I’ll have to do something else with it. Bugger that. Six months in, I’m sunk. Oh well.

I’m starting to think that I may not write that great book after all. I mean, I wrote one, and it’s a nice work — truly, read it and you’ll get it — and the unpublished one here is pretty fine, if I do say so. It’s just — it takes so much energy, so much ooomph to get these things out there. I can’t see doing it right now. I need to get centered and focused on writing again, maybe later in the year. I’m being green and crunchy-granola these days, very active in the sustainable realm, and that takes a lot of juice. Running this household takes a lot of juice. Running a news empire takes a lot of juice, too. Then there’s family and friends and holidays and whatever else. Then there’s vacations and good books to read and leisurely weekends with Mr. Husband and the rapidly-growing-up kids. And the cats. And the chickens we’re about to get. Lots going on.

Am I really going to get to focus on writing while I’m managing my special diet and exercise regimen? Writing down my food and making sure I get enough whole grains and vegetables? Not too much sweet? Uh. Not likely.

I’m feeling a bit defeatist about it just now. Like it’s there but I can’t get to it just now. Maybe later.

Advice to Writers: Time will tell.

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4 Replies to “as you can tell…”

  1. Julia
    It’s hard to change habits and focus on your own diet/exercise routine when you are by habit so focused on others (kids, husband, work, etc.). It takes at least 21 consistent days to get your brain to adopt it as its own. BUT stick with it and you will have more energy and more focus in the future. Lots of theories about why this happens but get the habit first. We need you!


  2. Hey woman! So go ahead and write the Year… you don’t have to publish dates. Just do 365 of ’em. That makes a year. Don’t ditch the idea… it’s too good to kill off!

    xoxo, k


    Just saw the “D” ward on yer blog and have sympathy for a sugar sister. I was diagnosed in April. No matter what the diabetes classes taught me, the only way I can stay on top of my blood glucose is to avoid simple carbs.

    No pasta, no bread, no rice, no corn , no grains at all. Dessert once a month, but only with a high protein and high fat meal. I’m back running at the lake and have dropped thirty pounds. Only 9000 to go.


  4. Whether you meant to or not, probably not, you just helped me to remember a lesson I thought I had etched into my brain years ago.

    It goes something like this: when you feel any kind of envy/desire/hero worship for someone else’s life, the truth is that they don’t have it nearly as good as you think. Usually there is something you don’t know, maybe they don’t even know yet, that will eventually prove that they are, in fact, human.

    I have always wondered how you kept up doing all that you do. Now I know, and it ain’t pretty. I am so glad to hear that you are FINALLY taking better care of yourself. On a selfish note, I’m glad to hear that you are only super woman, not super-super-unreal woman.


    P.S. I agree with “mamagotcha,” a year is 365 days total, not necessarily consecutive.

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